The practice of lamenting is one of expressing grief and sorrow; lament is distinctly Christian. Lamenting draws our attention from ourselves and toward God who wants to embrace us in our sorrow. This form of personal prayer conveys to God our authentic feelings of grief and sorrow. Consider the medical charting acronym SOAP in a new way: Lament calls us to speak to God; to be open to expressing our innermost feelings and thoughts; to ask boldly for what we think we need by praying; and to believe God's promises.
Our sorrows may range from minor, like not doing well on a quiz, to a big sorrow, such as a loved one being diagnosed with cancer. Speaking to God is being open and honest with him and with ourselves, asking for what we think we need, and praying his promises back to him. This requires leaning into God's promises and having hope not in ourselves but in him.
Lament is found throughout the Bible, but especially in the Psalms. More than one-third of the psalms are laments. That should get our attention! God is serious about helping us express our pain and find our way to hope! In his book, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament, Mark Vroegop writes, “Think of lament as the transition between pain and promise.”
Lament's Value in Nursing
Nurses experience their own grief and that of others. Nurses need to personally grieve so they can accompany others in their grief. Nursing is not a solo endeavor, and neither is grief. Grief is not linear nor distinct in its phases—it’s unique for each person. Lamenting as a Christian nursing student and as a nurse is important for personal hope and for transferring hope to patients and families. As we rest in God's mercy, he helps us clear our minds so we can be present for our patients.
How to Lament
In Psalm 13, King David is lamenting. The psalm begins with David complaining to God by being vulnerable and authentic about how he feels and thinks. “How long, O LORD, will you forget me? How long will you hide your face from me?” This kind of conversation directed toward God can be difficult as we don’t like to feel vulnerable and show God our true thoughts or feelings.
Next, David calls out to God, asking boldly, and submitting to God's will. David asks God to answer him by giving his eyes light (i.e., understanding). As Christians, we struggle to leave our lives completely in God’s hands; lamenting allows us to practice this.
David continues his lament, stating what he knows to be true of God:
“I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the Lord’s praise, for he has been good to me” (verses 5-6)
When you know that God is with you, loves you, and is growing your faith to know him more fully, you’ll feel more comfortable turning to God in sorrow and grief. God wants to hear from you, always!
Lament is about going to God with our small and great sorrows. He knows our hearts and minds completely--he wants us to be authentic and ask boldly for our desires and needs. Knowing God's Word and experiencing who God is allows us to experience his promises. Lamenting gives us a process to help revive hope for ourselves and others when we journey through the dark places of life.
Ashley Barstow, Hannah Smith, and Jessica Watson were BSN nursing student at Shenandoah University when they co-authored the article from which this post is excerpted. Their article appears in the October-December 2024 issue of JCN.
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