Christy Secor joined Nurses Christian Fellowship staff in 2018 as the Professional Ministries Director, providing support and leadership to our nurse group leaders. Recently, Christy has transitioned to the newly created role of Spiritual Formation and Prayer Specialist.
Q. How did this new position with NCF develop?
A. My strength in ministry lies in relationship. I believe that came from God. My passion is all about growing deeper in the relationship we have with God, building the relationships we have with each other, and supporting the relationships that extend into the community with the patients we serve.
So…with relationships being my strength, and with the reality of my husband, Dan’s, dementia progressing, I have been holding the Professional Ministries role very loosely. I’ve also been leaning on Kathy, NCF’s National Director, about the timing for a transition. This new role feels like a win-win. Jen, NCF’s Student Ministries Director (now overseeing the professional nurse groups) is able to bring her 20+ years of experience with groups and her expanded staff team to serve both the nurse groups and student groups. And I can develop in an area that God has gifted me.
Q. How does this position differ from your previous work as the Professional Ministries Director?
A. I’ll be focused on relationships with students, faculty, and nurses, and I can be a resource for our NCF staff. But true confession…I don’t like the job title! I mean – do they know how many things I struggle with in my own life? A friend reminded me that God equips us for what he calls us to do. I’ve been praying and growing through that – this is his work. Not mine.
I’m not doing counseling or therapy. But I do have my background with my Daring Way™ work that comes out of the research of Brené Brown. A lot of that research focuses on shame, vulnerability, courage, and empathy--sticking with our values, supporting people where they are, and learning to live our lives with authenticity.
It’s about walking with people through the things they are experiencing in their lives, whether personally or in their job world. Listening. Being present. I’m also focusing more on mentoring, to give time there where I didn’t have time before. I’m talking with people one on one–-people who are experiencing a huge disruption in their personal or professional lives, those situations where life is throwing things at them they never expected.
One nurse I've been connecting with is working through the reality of moral distress. There’s a disconnect that’s felt between the stated values of the healthcare system where she works and what she sees being acted out. This nurse has been doing a lot of work on resilience and authenticity. We use this work along with her faith to talk through these challenges.
I also spoke with a new grad recently about the culture she’s walking into on the hospital floor where she works--there’s a lot of drama among some of the staff. She doesn’t want to add to the drama or create waves. We’ve talked about when she should speak up for herself, the need to sometimes create waves, like when a patient is at risk, and how to stay focused on continuing to learn.
Spiritual care is one of the biggest questions we get at NCF. Can I pray with a patient? Am I allowed to share my faith? The Saline Process training, for which I’m a trainer, answers those questions. (See the article Supporting Spiritual Care with the Saline Process in the current issue of JCN.) NCF is hosting some training sessions this fall in September and October. The Saline training answers those spiritual care questions. If anyone is interested, I’d encourage them to check out NCF’s Events page.
Q. How would you define spiritual formation?
A. That’s a great question. When I think about how we become more like Jesus, I keep coming back to broken people supporting broken people through prayer, the Word, and the work of the Holy Spirit. How do we walk through the messy places of our lives and follow Jesus? How do we discern between the distractions that the enemy puts up and the distractions that God places in front of us?
I’ve been starting my day with four statements that I learned from Pastor Paul Johnson: [CS1]
- You are God and I am not.
- I am your beloved child.
- I choose to die to myself so that I might truly live.
- Fill me with your Holy Spirit.
This thinking changes my entire perspective for the day. Do I still mess up? Yes. Do I need to go back and ask people for forgiveness? Yes. But these truths allow me to begin my day from a different place. It creates space for the values I have about authenticity and being real with others, and to create a safe space so others can feel open to share. It helps me to be open to what God wants to teach me that day.
In helping others with their own spiritual formation, I’m not there to judge…just to support others as they are working through whatever is happening in their lives and growing to be more like Jesus. It’s messy. And God willingly steps into that messiness with us to tell us we are worthy. We have value. He sees us.
Spiritual formation is not a list: Did you have a quiet time? Did you pray? It’s not checking off boxes. It goes back to reality, to experiencing intimacy with God. As I look at what’s happening with Dan due to the dementia, I’ve had to accept this isn’t how I imagined our older years were going to be. I’m learning to turn to God for what I need in each day. If I look ahead, I get overwhelmed. There’s enough in today.
I think spiritual formation involves learning how to lean into God. Our natural tendency when we hit a situation like this is to tense up and resist: “I can’t do this.” Think of the patient who’s just had a knee replacement and you’re getting them up and standing for the first time. That person’s national tendency is to tense up and resist the change in position. It creates more pain for them. But if they can be open…if they can breathe through the experience, they stand. They grow. They progress. I’m learning those lessons every day.
Q. What are you asking God and looking for him to accomplish as you serve in this new position?
A. My mama used to talk about listening for the sound of sandaled feet (hearing Jesus). I want to be able to hear what God says about where to go in this work. I want to communicate encouragement and hope to others and see them grow in their relationships in those same ways.
We’re broken people supporting broken people, and we’re doing that in community. I want God to provide insight as to how we can experience and do community better in NCF. How can we grow to be a truer reflection of him in all that we do and in all that we are? Walking with people through what we are each experiencing, growing to become more like Jesus...that’s relationship.
Christy and former NCF Director Jane Hall will be leading the discussion about Empathy: The Gift of Connecting during the October 17, 2024, Journal Club webinar. Register here (free CE for NCF members!).
